Full Voicemail Box

Dude, seriously, how hard is it to listen to your voicemail and delete messages that are no longer pertinent?  It takes like ten seconds man.  How the fuck am I supposed to leave you a message informing you I ran into Darla, your ex-girlfriend, last night and how she was wasted and knows about Cindy, that slutty chick you've been hooking up with lately (the same one I told you to stay the fuck away from, but far be it from me to tell you what to do...), and she wants to rip her jugular out and drink the blood spraying from her carotid artery.  That's after she chops your balls off with a dull hatchet.  Man, how the hell did you ever get involved with her?  Anyway, yeah, text message you say?  I don't think that's gonna cut it dipshit.  I'm not going to write you a freaking novel to enlighten you about last night's mayhem.  I need to talk to you or leave a message so you'll call my ass back.  But no, all I get is, "The subscriber you are trying to reach has a voicemail box that is full.  Please try again later."  Later, like when?  30 seconds from now or later, like after you run into Darla again.  Dammit man!  Or, even better pal, what if I was your doctor calling to say you have Ebola or maybe, the test results came back and you're deathly allergic to shitty beer so don't go to that party in Ellensburg this weekend.  Or shit, I don't know, maybe your mom had a fall and broke her hip.  Clean out your fucking voicemail box asshole!  Rabble-B