God vs. The Rapist

Remember the SNL Celebrity Jeopardy skit when Sean Connery asks for the category "The Rapists" and Alex Trebek corrects him with the correct title, "Therapists"?  Though Celebrity Jeopardy might be the best SNL skits of all time, rape isn't funny.  Which brings me to Ben "giant piece of shit rapist that never did any time because he's a rich football player" Rothelisberger, quarterback for the Steelers.  And on the opposite end of the spectrum Tim "did I tell you I'm Christian yet today" Tebow and a wildcard playoff game that took place last Sunday. 

Now, I'm not sure how Timmy reconciles working on the Lord's Day but I'm sure glad he does.  Tebow has a lot of detractors and plenty of fans too with the meteoric rise of Tebow Nation.  I think it's great Tim Tebow is Christian, and frankly all the people ripping him up for that are just a bunch of jackasses that think they're better than religion or spirituality but really project a more "holier than thou" attitude than Tebow or most religious folks I know.  But, for the record, "Yeah, Tim, we get it, just go win some more games now please." 

Anyway, the point of this rabble is go Broncos, go Tebow and go God!  Because any possible reason Ben and the Steelers can be defeated, preferably with Ben getting carted off the field with a broken pelvis, is A-okay with me.  Suck it Ben, God loves everyone, but he isn't fond of unrepentant (I know you apologized and settled out of court but we're not buying that shit) rapists so yeah, don't look forward to many more NFL championships in the future.  Just watch out for the D-line son!

Next weeks headline God vs. Cheaters and Douches, when Timmy and the Broncos take on the Patriots.  Here's advice for you guys in the red, white and blue.  Belichick, one of the ten commandments says not to bear false witness, and cheating, like taping your opponents practices to get an edge is lying.  Watch out brossif.  And sir Brady, I'm pretty sure there's a rule somewhere in the Bible or Koran or Bagavad Gitas about not being a stupid douche.  So yeah, wear some extra helmet padding and be careful of lightning seeing as you're playing outside.  Rabble-B