Saturday, June 16, 2012

Uuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhh...........

Simply amazing.  Unrabble-B


Thursday, June 14, 2012

Dude, you got an extra glow stick?

Read the following article and tell me what the stupidest part is...

©AP/ Chris Martin
© AP/ Chris Martin
Flashing wristbands cost Coldplay $640,000 a night
WENN Coldplay spent an estimated $640,000 a night to supply fans with flashing wristbands that lit up in time to the beat of their music at concerts.
The electronic bracelets have been worn by fans around the world on the band's Mylo Xyloto tour, filling venues with color during the group's hits, but frontman Chris Martin recently revealed that he and his bandmates were reconsidering using the cool gimmick because it was proving too expensive.
"Most of the money we're earning on the tour is put into the wristbands," Martin said. "We have to figure out how to keep it going without going broke because it's a crucial part of the concert."
Guitarist Jonny Buckland said the price of the bracelets has cost the group more than half a million dollars a night to fund the initiative, but he hopes they will be able to continue handing out the light devices for free at gigs.
He tells Bauer Radio, "It looks amazing. It just makes everyone have a great time, most of all us. And it just feels so magical."
It is not yet known if Coldplay will use the wristbands when they kick off the second leg of their North American tour in Texas next week.

Ok, if you guessed is was the fact that Coldplay makes more than $640,000 in a single show and blows it all on super lame bracelets then good, you read the headline but no, that's not what we're looking for.

If you said it was the quote from guitarist Jonny 'dumbass' Buckland about how the wristbands are 'magical' then good, you read the whole article and yes, you did choose a superbly lame ass quote by a superbly lame ass douche about a superbly lame ass gimmick that costs $640,000 a night.

If you guessed the stupidest part was the title of their tour 'Mylo Xyloto' which besides having three consonants together is almost unpronounceable and means absolutely nothing but was just thought up while getting high in your $10 million home studio then good for you, you're almost right.

No, the stupidest part about this article is the photo of that whiny, dumb sissy Chris Martin looking like a sad little puppy lost to the world singing your favorite song he probably didn't write while taking your hard earned money paid for a great concert experience and handing out light up wristbands like it's a fucking rave and we're all on E but after he walks off stage into the arms of Gwenyth Paltrow tears streaming down his face at all the money his band wasted on worthless wristbands that look like they should be in a pair of little kid's $10 light up shoes and how if he'd only rejected the whole idea in the first place he could buy that mansion on the moon that he's always dreamed up since he was a little boy on the war torn streets of England.

Yeah, if you guess that then good for you, you're right.  However, you'll be lucky to make $640K in twenty years let alone blow it all on raver wear.  So just know that Chris Martin hates you and wants you to know it.  Rabble fucking Rabble-B

Monday, June 4, 2012

I'm all hopped up on Mountain Dew

New York City mayor Michael Bloomberg is trying to ban pop sold in quantities larger than 16oz.  Now, I'm not really a pop fan, it rots your teeth and makes you fat.  But, if some dumbass wants to buy a gallon of pop and suck it down that's fine.  Besides the obvious 1984, repressive government observations you can make the best part is the measure would affect movie theaters, restaurants, ball parks and the like but not grocery or convenience stores.  Seriously.  Good luck curbing obesity by making people by their 2-liter of pop and bring it into a movie in their coat pocket.  Spoiler alert: They already do! 

And so what if you can only buy 16oz of pop at the ball game?  You can just buy another one and you're back up to the 32oz jumbo drink you really wanted in the first place.  Now it just creates more waste by coming in two containers and makes you angry because you have to use two hands and precariously balance your nachos on top.

And what about Big Macs and KFC and those liquid cheese covered nachos?  And what the fuck about alcohol?  You can still buy a 40 of OE but not a 40 of Dr Pepper?  When are we going to give up trying to save people from themselves?  Everyone already knows what is good and bad for you, we don't need the government constantly telling us so.  Rabble-B