Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits

And also apparently decapitates Toadstool with a roundhouse kick and rescues the princess in about 30 seconds.  He also has infinity to the fourth power lives.  Though neither of the Mario brothers appear watch this video or Chuck Norris might kill you in your sleep.  Unrabble-B

Meat Flavored Meat

I ate this Torta (Or, actually one just like it.  This belongs to my friend Andrew who didn't finish it) tonight.  It's possibly the meatiest thing I've ever eaten.  No joke, it's amazing and certainly one of the best sandwiches in America.  Though tortas are Mexican sandwiches, there's nothing Mexican about this thing, rather lots of red,white and blue.  And not in a George Bush, "I'm just a good ol' boy, clearing brush on my ranch.", bullshit kind of way.  Like straight up American street food kind of way.  Though it's not technically made on the street either, rather about 10 feet indoors. 

Anyway, it contains: breaded steak, chorizo mixed with egg, ham, bacon, sliced up hotdog, jalapeno, tomato, mayo and probably a few other treats, all between two giant pieces of french bread.  I feel as though I might birth some weird hybrid cow, pig, chicken creature.  It sure looks as if I'm pregnant anyway. 

So yeah, if you're sandwich kind of folk, you should put it on your life list.  Let me know and I'll tell you where it is.  Even better, we'll go together. 

Also, I saw Hobo Family Band tonight for the third time in a week.  I'm starting to think their repertoire consists of a select few Beatles songs because they played Norwegian Wood again for the second time in a row.  Oh Family Hobo Band...  Unrabble/Rabble-B

BARTworld BARTworld

Too bad my friends are staying at the Mandarin Oriental in SF like a couple of losers.  While they're tucked in their suite, lounging around on 2000 thread count Egyptian cotton sheets and champagne looking out over the city and the Bay, their multi million dollar view, after eating super chompy sandwiches with fries and coleslaw on them.  I got to see Hobo Family Band again.  This time they played Norwegian Wood.  So I'm not sure if they're a Beatles cover band or I just happen to hit them twice in one week playing Beatles covers.  Either way I saw them at the exact same place as last time, right before I transferred trains, luckily.  Though tonight some guy got run over and killed by a BART train at the MacAurthur station so the train didn't stop there.  Totally awful and crazy, yet somehow fairly normal for the Bay Area.  Another day in BARTworld.  Rabble-B

Conan O'Brien Can't Stop

Just finished the documentary, Conan O'Brien Can't Stop.  Except for the Eddie Vedder cameo, it's awesome.  Watch it!  Unrabble-B

Bike-asaurus

You know Truck-asaurus the stupid fire breathing robot at those redneck monster truck rallies (ok, they're super trashy but really fun too, kind of like ATV's)?  Ya, well he's got nothing on this thing I saw by my house last night.  Bike-asaurus would rip his ass limb from limb and swallow each limb whole, then boil his guts with a potato to get a stew goin'.  And even better, Bike-asaurus is homemade.  And well, yeah, I'm sure I'd be disappointed if I saw the owner of this bike and when he actually probably looks and acts like the comic book store guy from The Simpsons I'd be pretty bummed.  Though I'm pretty sure comic book store guy would never ride a bike.  But then again, I do live in Berkeley.  Whatever, it's got green lights on it and you'd never miss it in traffic!  So rad!  Unrabble-B

Not so Lucky Charms

So I bought a box of Lucky Charms yesterday (my favorite cereal which I don't usually buy because $5.50 is insane for a box full of puffed wheat and dehydrated marshmallows) because it was on sale.  Ok, I'm stoked.  And on top of that, inside is a freaking Star Wars pen!  Yeah!  And it has a picture on the front of a sweet ass R2D2 pen.  Best toy ever in a box of cereal right?  You might get Darth Vader or Boba Fett or fucking Chewy!  And if maybe if your box is full of Unlucky Charms you might get Lando Calrissian right?  No big.  But what pen fall out of the box into my bowl of sweet, chompy cereal?  Jar Jar Fucking Binks!  Seriously, are you kidding me?!  Out of all the cool Star Wars characters I get the absolute worst one, the most reviled character in all six films  Ah come on! 

I bet all of them are Jar Jar Binks, they just put R2D2 on the box for show.  They're all the left over favors from the last Vegas Star Wars convention.  General Mills got a smokin' deal on them yet another dump truck full of cash backed up to George Lucas' house.  Rabble Fucking Rabbletron-B

BARTworld BARTworld

Just got off the BART.  I love it when a crazy bum gets on the train wearing a full gray, stained sweatsuit and stinking to high heaven.  Reeking so bad in fact that literally everyone around him instantly moves away.  Of course the crazy bum starts talking shit (and by shit I mean unintelligible nonsense) and everyone moves even further away.  A couple ladies turn away and try to cover noses with scarves, a couple people get out of their seats and actually move to a different car.  Even bum Santa with food stains all over the front of his sweat shirt is horrified at the stench. 

Good thing the family hobo band walks into the same car at one stop whispering, "cops, cops, cops" as there's a foot patrol outside at the station.  The car is pretty crowded so family hobo band (father, clearly not wearing underwear, and two sons) can't properly get their jam on.  In the meantime crazy bum is still rambling, though quieter now, and emitting a nauseating odor.  What seems an eternity later, we hit the transfer station and as soon as the majority of the riders exit the car the family hobo band loudly strikes up "Blackbird", and not a terrible rendition I'd say.  Who could've predicted that crazy, stinky bum's Kryptonite, as Christine put it, would be a family hobo band jammin' some oldies?  Because as soon as the first chord of Blackbird was strummed he bolted for another car.  Poor riders didn't know what was coming.  Ah, BARTworld.  Rabble-B